Based on what the comments made by my reviewers, I plan to a few revisions. First I plan to clarify my essay so that it is clear what I am going to write about, especially at the end of the first paragraph. Both reviewers said that the end of the first paragraph was unclear so I will pay particular attention to that part of my paper. Secondly I will try to show more about where I am fishing so the reader has a better idea of the setting, so they can better visualize the whole story. Finally I need to make sure that my paper doesn’t jump from the past tense to the present tense and if it does, make sure that reader does not lose their sense of time.